Tag: 怎么找附近卖的学生

The Devil wears Nike, straw hats

first_imgIt hasn’t been easy being a Dolphins fan the last decade or so.Let’s do a quick recap. Since 1997 Miami fans have had to watch:A) Dan Marino wind down his career with Oronde Gadsden (or maybe O.J. McDuffie) as his best playmaker.B) No. 13’s last game, an agonizing 62-7 dismemberment at the hands of the Jacksonville Jaguars.C) A parade of Marino “replacements,” suffering through the likes of Jay Fiedler, A.J. Feeley, Sage Rosenfels, Ray Lucas and Cleo Lemon.And finally,D) That group of Interceptions Anonymous members leading Miami to five straight years out of the playoffs, making Dol-fans want to make like ostriches and bury their heads in the sand.It’s been a rough decade. Ricky Williams’ choosing a $7-a-day tent in Australia over the ‘Phins was pretty indicative of how this once-proud franchise is now floundering. The team has gone from being super-hero porpoise Flipper to the Mahi-Mahi half of a surf and turf.But now the Dolphins have really hit rock bottom — or floated up to the top, as it were.After two mediocre seasons, the savior in a straw hat, Nick Saban, lied to the world and left South Beach for — brace yourself — Tuscaloosa, Ala. to return to college coaching. Not only did Saban thrust Miami back into another rebuilding phase, he has left the team in worse shape than he found it. He has also all but assured that the talents and careers of Jason Taylor and Zach Thomas will be totally wasted, just like Marino’s.Muchachos and chiquitas in Miami are referring to the coach as Nick Satan. Is it just simple wordplay, or are the SoFla beach bums onto something? Let’s break it down.The name gameThe Dark Lord goes by many names, such as Satan, the devil, Lucifer, the Little Horn, Most Unclean, Belial, the Morning Star and even occasionally (though incorrectly) Beelzebub.Nick Saban? He might even have more titles than the not-so-jolly red giant downstairs. He has been head coach of (fill in the name of the highest bidder), since he was first hired at Toledo, where he stayed all of one season. In his 33-year coaching career, he has held 14 different jobs, including six different coaching jobs since 1990, averaging less than three years at any stop. Door-to-door blender salesmen have more stability than that.The devil is often described as a shape shifter; the same could be said of Saban. If you were to look at Saban every couple of years he would never appear to be the same way, wearing different team colors at each glance. Still, it’s hard to call Saban a traitor, since he really hasn’t ever had any allegiance anyway.Flaming trousersWe’ve all heard that old children’s tease, “Liar, liar, pants on fire.” Hell’s overseer certainly is proof of that. One of his many names is, not coincidentally, “Liar” (John 8:33, if you think my pants are aflame), and he resides in an abode that’s chief structural component is fire. So, if he’s still wearing pants, board shorts, capris or even boxers, they are most certainly burning at this moment.But the point is that Satan lies. A lot. It’s basically his most distinguishing characteristic, you know, after his horns, red skin and giant pitchfork.Saban is a liar. On Dec. 21, he blatantly gave the most false statement since Clinton’s Monica Lewinsky denial or Subway’s assertion that they are “the healthy choice.”“I guess I have to say it: I’m not going to be the Alabama coach,” Saban said, impressively without the slightest hint of a lisp, despite his forked tongue.GreedEl Diablo makes his living off of thriving on the seven deadly sins, one of which is greed. To say Saban is greedy is like saying Patrick Stewart’s hair is thinning. The guy left a job that was paying him more than $4 million a year and for what? Mo’ money, mo’ money, mo’ money.With LSU he signed a contract that guaranteed he would always be the highest paid college coach. That in itself is unbelievably greedy. He then jumped to the NFL as soon as the Dolphins threw more greenbacks at him.In fact, if the price were right, Saban would surely bolt to the Oakland Raiders, Harlem Globetrotters or New York Yankees (I hear they want him to pitch).Home, Sweet HomeThe Notorious S-A-T (to the A-N) lives in hell. Obviously it isn’t the best of places to reside in.According to Statemaster.com, Alabama is the 11th worst state to live in. Now while that isn’t exactly a paradise, it would appear to be slightly above hell. Sixth worst would make sense, as six is traditionally the devil’s numeral of choice. However, you have to read between the lines.Some recent players who have worn No. 11 are Isaiah Thomas and Daunte Culpepper, two individuals currently in the process of ruining their respective franchises, a very evil thing.Eleven is also a prime number and thus indivisible into an integer, which makes it an individual and not a team player. In sports, you better be a team player, otherwise you are evil — like T.O., Barry Bonds and Dale Earnhardt Jr.While I admit this logic is a little bit of a stretch, I think it’s fair to say no one you know wants to live in Alabama, not even if they will have the most tricked out double-wide on the block, like Saban will. It’s close enough to hell on earth.The fact is Saban also makes babies cry (Manny Wright), is often beet red (and I don’t think it’s the tropical sun) and is always wearing a hat (obviously to cover up his horns). He’ll also be sporting some pretty fiery crimson this year at ‘Bama. His pitchfork is a whistle and his tail was surgically removed, so that he could be more comfortable sitting down for job interviews (which he constantly is).But you know why Saban has to be a demon in coach’s clothing? Because anyone who saw “Little Nicky” knows the Dark Lord is, in fact, a Jets fan. And no one but a Jets fan could be this evil.Dave McGrath is a senior majoring in English and journalism. If you have any tips to help him learn black magic to place a curse on Saban, you can reach him at dmcgrath@badgerherald.comlast_img read more

Read More

Senior departures leave hole at LB

first_imgJust like the quarterback position, the Wisconsin linebackers will be battling all spring for spots on the depth chart.[/media-credit]While a lot of focus this spring season will be directed toward the Wisconsin quarterback and running back positions, there also are several defensive positions with question marks.Among those is linebacker, where the Badgers will be without the services of graduating seniors Jonathan Casillas and DeAndre Levy, as well as Elijah Hodge, who has decided to forego his fifth year in favor of graduating in May.Replacing the two starters and three seniors will be a tough challenge for the Badgers over the next five months before the 2009 season kicks off.“Those three guys — Dre, JC and even Hodge — all made a lot of tackles last year,” linebacker Jaevery McFadden said. “But, there’s not really a lot of pressure. I feel like this year we’re just trying to get back to the basics of being a physical, dominant team.”“It’s exciting this spring with JC and DeAndre Levy leaving,” linebacker Blake Sorensen added. “Guys need to step up, and right now my name’s being called, so it’s a lot of fun. We’ve just got to try to get better this spring and improve.”Enter juniors Sorenson and Culmer St. Jean alongside redshirt senior McFadden — who led the team in tackles with 84 as a starter in 2008 — into the starting lineup for Wisconsin.As the current No. 1 unit at linebacker for Wisconsin in spring ball, Sorenson, St. Jean and McFadden also are the only Badgers with starting experience at the position. As a result, the questions of depth and youth at linebacker come into play.“As far as depth, there’s guys that don’t really have that experience,” McFadden said. “But we’ve got a lot of good guys that can really play. They just need to get the playbook down and the basics of the defense to make our depth that much more reliable.”Sorenson, a 6-foot-1-inch native of Eden Prairie, Minn., has been a reliable special teams player for the Badgers over his first two seasons while seeing some time at linebacker, but with the opportunity to enter the season as a starting outside linebacker, he knows he must make the most of it.Not only is it Sorenson’s chance to prove he deserves the starting role, but with a lack of depth at linebacker, Wisconsin will need Sorenson to play a big role defensively in 2009.“It’s really important; the guys are counting on me to do well, and I also put a lot of pressure on myself to do well,” Sorenson said. “I just try to come out and compete every day to try to get better.”The 6-foot-1-inch St. Jean also played a lot on special teams last year for the Badgers before recording a career-high nine tackles while seeing extensive time at linebacker against Cal Poly and starting against Florida State in the bowl game.St. Jean will replace McFadden at middle linebacker this season, forcing the redshirt senior to the outside and earning not only the pressure of starting, but also the added weight that comes along with playing in the middle of the Badgers’ defense.“In my eyes, I see it as the quarterback of the defense,” St. Jean said. “I’m just trying to improve and take that leader role and make plays.”And though two-thirds of the starting lineup is different than it was at this time a year ago, the players don’t feel like the situation they find themselves in is really much different.“Nothing has really changed,” St. Jean said. “I played with [Sorenson and McFadden] before as the twos, so the chemistry is there and the communication is there. The only difference now is that we’re in the starting roles.”As the only senior starting linebacker, McFadden has had to step up into a leadership role as well with the departure of Casillas, Levy and Hodge. For the 6-foot-3-inch native of Riviera Beach, Fla., the transition has been one of actions more than words.McFadden has made an effort to be a leader wherever he can, from what he does on the field to the little things, like cleaning up after himself in the locker room.“I’m just trying to be a leader in everything I do,” McFadden said. “Everybody is looking at me to lead with me being the oldest guy here now, and I think actions speak louder than words. So, I’m just basically trying to do the right thing all the time.”Additionally, as the elder statesman of the group, McFadden has had the opportunity to watch both Sorenson and St. Jean develop over the last two years, giving him a good perspective on their respective strengths and weaknesses.Sorenson and St. Jean showed what they could do Saturday in practice — the first with full pads — as they both recorded interceptions during drills against the first-string offense.While the interceptions may not count for much in spring ball, the opportunity to pick off their own quarterbacks gives the linebackers an extra sense of confidence.“We have a big play chart and a bad play chart, and we always compete,” St. Jean said. “Any time you can get your name on that big play chart, you get a little bragging rights and you can talk a little smack to the opposite side of the ball, so it’s fun.”For McFadden, the key to both players is their wealth of game experience despite this being the first year in a starting role.“Blake is a good guy — he does a lot of good things,” McFadden said. “And even though this is his first year starting, I think Blake will surprise people with what he can do.”“Culmer has a lot of game experience, but this is his first year starting out starting,” McFadden continued. “He showed what he can do in a couple games last year, and I think those two guys are going to pick up right where JC, Dre and Hodge left off.”last_img read more

Read More